“N” is for News–Or is it?

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N

I don’t watch the news very often. I rely on fabulous bloggers like Elyse at FiftyFourAndAHalf.com to keep me updated on the news I might actually be interested in. And Twitter feeds which are every bit as fascinating and as accurate as our local news outlets.

But tonight, while cooking dinner, The Eldest and I shared a little news bonding time outside of our normal Daily Show and Colbert Report.

We were treated to two—not one but two—EXCLUSIVE LIVE CHOPPER FIVE NEWS VIEWS. But before I share those shots with you, since some of you aren’t privy to Memphis local news stations, let me tell you why I stopped watching local news.

It was 2005, years after Nancy Reagan’s “Just Say No” campaign encouraged peer-pressured teens to pass on the cocaine lines and ganja puffs. Husband2.0 and I tuned in to the Chapel Hill, NC news just in time to learn about a large drug bust in nearby Durham, NC. Blue lights flashed on the screen from no less than ten police cruisers. I was proud that our force was cracking down on hardened drug traffickers! The anchor informed us that police seized…

“FIFTY grams of marijuana!” with much emphasis on the “fifty” and big round eyes to drive home the danger we were all in with this much hippie lettuce on the streets.

Wow! I felt so much safer.

Until I used my brain. I looked at Husband2.0 and said, “Did she say ‘FIFTY grams of marijuana’?”

“Yep.”

“Ummm, isn’t that about the amount in my Lawry’s Pumpkin Pie Spice container?”

“Yep.”

A container of pumpkin pie spice. Español: Un ...

Seriously, go grab one of your spice containers and see how much fifty grams is. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

And that’s why I stopped watching local news.

But after tonight’s two—not one but two—EXCLUSIVE LIVE CHOPPER FIVE NEWS VIEWS, I might reconsider my news watching habits.

The first EXCLUSIVE LIVE FIVE CHOPPER NEWS VIEW was of the top of the Memphis post office because that’s where the ricin-laced letters sent to the POTUS and Sen. Roger Wicker (R-MS) where postmarked.

And the second EXCLUSIVE FIVE LIVE CHOPPER NEWS VIEW was of another building where something of so much significance happened that I’ve already forgotten what it was.

I think it’s back to the Daily Show and Colbert Report for me. At least we get funny faces with their news reports.